


Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere

by emalilly23



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Domestic, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Pre-Captain America: The First Avenger, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Sick Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-19
Updated: 2015-03-19
Packaged: 2018-03-18 16:02:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3575322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emalilly23/pseuds/emalilly23
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky has always been there for Steve. But will Steve be there for Bucky when something unexpected happens?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere

**Author's Note:**

  * For [biblionerd07](https://archiveofourown.org/users/biblionerd07/gifts).



> I had a lot of fun writing this. This is my first pre-cap fic. Hope you enjoy!

“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”

Bucky had repeated those words to Steve several times over the past years; and he had been true to his word. Every time Steve had fallen ill, Bucky was there. When they were younger, Bucky would sneak into Steve’s apartment and climb into bed with the younger boy, keeping him warm. And after Steve’s Ma had passed, Steve had wanted to be alone, but Bucky still climbed through the window and stayed with his best friend.

They now shared an apartment in Brooklyn. A small, dingy old place, but all they can afford. There’s one bed in the studio pushed up against the back wall. Luckily it’s big enough for both men, they just have to press up against each other. Between the door and the bed is the kitchen and small living room.

In the morning, Bucky woke up as silently as he could to get ready for work. He knew Steve wasn’t getting a lot of sleep. It was late October and the winter chill was upon them. Bucky ran a hand through his hair and changed into his work clothes. With winter coming around, he knew there were going to be lay-offs at the docks. He wasn’t sure what would happen to them if… No, he wouldn’t allow himself to think like that. He and Steve were going to get by this winter. Bucky doesn’t leave a note on the counter for Steve, like he normally does. Instead, he leaves a glass of milk on the table.

*  *  *

Steve woke up about half an hour after Bucky left. As he sat up in bed, Steve was met with a coughing fit. He waited for it to pass before getting up. His plan for today was the same as every other day: wandering the streets looking for a job. Of course, Steve never told Bucky this. Bucky’d have a fit if he knew Steve was out in the cold. But Steve knew how much he was costing Bucky.

Pulling on the same slacks as yesterday, Steve made a slice of toast and drank half the milk. He left the apartment wrapped up in his old jacket. Still as hopeful as he was yesterday.

*  *  *

Steve returned home an hour before Bucky got off work empty handed. He started sketching something to show Bucky when he got home. Steve knew what was happening, but ignored it. He claimed he was just warm from the change in temperature. He sat by the back window, sketching the trash bins on the other side of the street. By the time he started sketching the buildings behind the bins, his hand was starting to shake. Sweat was starting to bead around his hairline. And by the time Bucky returned home, Steve had sweat through his shirt.

“Hey Buck. How w-was work?” Steve sat back as a shiver ran through his body. Bucky approached him and place his hand on Steve’s forehead.

“Jesus Steve, you’re burning up.”

“I’m fine. Been fine all day.” Steve said knocking Bucky’s hand away from his arm.

“You’re freezing. Did you go out today? I’ve told you before: you don’t need to get a job. We’ll get by.” Bucky retrieved their thin blanket from the bed and wrapped it around Steve. “Now come on. Into bed.” He moved to Steve from the chair.

“I got it Buck. Don’t need help.”

“Alright. I’ll heat us up some beans.”

“You never answered my question: how was work?” Steve called from the bed. “They start layin’ off people for the winter?”

“Yeah, Lewis gave five guys the sac today. But don’t worry, I plan on staying through the winter.”

“Was listening to the neighbour’s radio today. What’s happening in Europe right now; it’s sickening. I want to go over there and help. Do something.” Bucky moved over to the bed with their beans and faced his friend, placing a hand on the small shoulder.  

“I know you do. It shouldn’t be long before they start recruiting over here.” He let his hand drop and ate his meal. Bucky proceeded to tell Steve about the guys at work.

“There was this dame passing by. And Nick, God help him, tried sweet talking her into going out with him. Before he could finish his sentence, she slapped him right across the face and stormed off.”

“Sounds like he had it comin’,” Steve mumbled from beneath his skimpy blanket. Bucky got up to wash their dishes while Steve laid silently until Bucky was putting them away.

“Buck, why aren’t you going out with any dame nowadays? You used to go out ‘least twice a week.” Bucky moved back towards the bed and laid down beside his best friend.

“Dunno. Haven’t seen any pretty ones. Plus, if extra shifts at the docks turn up, I’d like to take them.” Steve didn’t seem to buy Bucky’s excuse, but he let it slide.

“You should go out. Go down to the dance hall and some dame.”

“Only if you come with me,” Bucky smirked, snaking an arm around Steve’s shoulders.

“Bucky, you know how dancin’ and I don’t mix.”

“Come on Stevie, it’ll be fun. You, me, and two beautiful dames.” Buck knew Steve would never come, no matter how hard he tried to convince him.

“Maybe,” Steve yawned. “We can talk about it tomorrow. G'night Buck.” Steve snuggled down on the bed. After a few minutes, Bucky changed out of his work clothes and joined Steve. His arms went to curl around the younger man to keep him warm.

After a few minutes, and when Bucky knew Steve was asleep, he gently placed a kiss to Steve’s temple and whispered, “I love you.”

*  *  *

Bucky woke before Steve as he normally did. But before he got up, he pulled Steve closer closer towards him, place a light kiss on his neck, and snuggled his head into the space between Steve’s should and the pillow. But little did he know, his best friend was awake and fighting every instinct from relaxing further into Bucky’s arms.

*  *  *

Steve didn’t wait long -just as Bucky rolled off the bed- before pretending to wake up. He took a big breath and started to sit up.

“Morn,” cough, “in’,” cough, “Bu,” cough, “ck.”

“Hey,” Bucky reached for the glass of water they kept beside the bed and let Steve take a few sips. “Do you remember if we have any of those asthma cigarettes left r?”

“No,” cough. “Used them all up in the summer. I’ll be okay Buck. I swear.”

Bucky moved to the kitchen to heat up a pot of water for oatmeal. As he let it warm up, he headed for the bathroom to wash up. When he returned, Steve was stirring the oatmeal into the pot.

“The hell do you think you’re doing. Get your butt back in bed,” Bucky scorned.

“Just tryna help. I only got a cough.” And to prove his point, a tiny cough escaped Steve’s lungs.

“Like hell you can. Bed. Now.” Bucky pointed towards their bed. “I’ll bring you everything you could ever need. Just get out of the damn kitchen.”

Steve sat back down in bed in a huff. Bucky quickly returned with a bowl of oatmeal and all of Steve’s drawing supplies as well as the two books they owned.

“Just, please, stay in bed. I’d rather not come home to a dead body.”

“Jerk.”

“Punk.” Bucky smiled. “See ya later Stevie,” I love you, he thought as he left their apartment.

*  *  *

As usual, Steve got worse before he got better. Steve spent days wrapped up in bed shivering and covered in sweat. At night, Bucky was always pressed up against him to keep him warm. There were some nights Bucky didn’t sleep at all. Bucky loved and hated it. He got to be close to Steve, but under these shitty circumstances.

This went on for the rest of the winter: Steve would get sick, and Bucky would “nurse” him back to life. On the night when Steve seemed okay, Bucky went out down to the dance hall, but nothing ever happened. During the time when Steve didn’t feel too sick, he would sometimes be able to pick up a shift or two at the grocer’s down the street. Bagging groceries and managing the cash register. It was dry and somewhat warm inside so Steve managed it. Bucky was lucky enough to keep his job at the docks during the winter, so they were able to refill a few of Steve’s prescriptions.

But without fail, every morning Bucky would hold Steve close and press a light kiss to his forehead. Sometimes, if he knew Steve was sound asleep, he would whisper “I love you” into Steve’s hair.

And one morning, April 4th, Bucky leaned in and whispered those three words into his best friend’s hair. But what happened as soon as he said those three words made him freeze.

“I love you too, Buck.”

All Bucky could do was lay still. Surely he hadn’t heard Steve correctly. So he just sat there until Steve rolled over to face his friend.

“I love you. That what you whispered and have whispered almost every morning, right?” Doubt started to seep into his words as he finished the sentence. Had he just confessed his love to a friend who only loves him back as a friend? Had he just ruined years of friendship over something he thought he heard?

“Steve…” Bucky felt him shiver in his arms. “Steve, I do love you.” Bucky moved his arms to stroke the hair off Steve’s forehead. Bucky smiled at Steve; the smile he reserved just for Steve. But it felt different this time. Bucky was scared because he knew he still loved girls, but he loved Steve -had for a while- but pushed those feelings down. He’d deal with them later. Had Bucky just make a mistake? He shouldn’t have said anything, tried to act normal once he heard Steve first mumble the words back to him.

Untangling himself from Steve, Bucky headed for the bathroom. He returned a few minutes later after splashing cool water on his face and brushing his teeth. Steve still in bed as Bucky got dressed. As Bucky was about to leave, Steve stopped him.

“Buck, what you said before…”

Bucky, with his jacket in hand facing away from Steve mumbled just loud enough for Steve to hear, “we’ll talk about it when I get home. Promise.” He needed time to think, to process what had happened.

Steve was left alone in the apartment wondering what had just happened and if he had lost his best friend.

*  *  *

Bucky stumbled in later that usual.

“Steve?” Bucky slurred to the quiet apartment. He didn’t hear a response, but in the back of his mind he knew Steve was there. Nothing seemed off until he noticed Steve curled up in bed shivering. He immediately regretted going out to the bar with the guys at the docks after work. Kicking off his boots Bucky made his way to the bed, bumping into a few pieces of furniture on his way. “Hey…” Bucky slurred while tucking a piece of hair behind Steve’s ear once he crawled onto the bed. “Stevie, I’m here.”

Steve was somewhere between conscious and unconscious. He wasn’t completely sure if Bucky was there or not. After what had happened earlier that day, Steve had collapsed on the bed. Not having the energy to move, he stayed there all.

“Buck…”  

“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.” Bucky bundled up their quilt and dumped it all onto Steve. “I’ll just be in the kitchen. Gonna warm you up some chicken broth.” As he set the pot to warm, Bucky ran for a wash cloth from the bathroom. He returned to Steve, kneeling beside him on the floor. Dabbing the cloth onto Steve’s face seemed to do something. He hummed against the cool fabric as the rest of him shivered. His eyes fluttered open and caught Bucky’s hand in his own.

“Don’t...go,” Steve croaked.

“I’m not. Just gonna to grab the broth. It’ll cheer ya up.” Bucky was reluctant to get up, but knew if he didn’t, something some how would catch fire. The broth was poured into a bowl and the cutlery draw was ripped open and slammed shut within seconds. And Bucky returned to the bed balancing the bowl in one hand and the glass from the side table in the other.

Steve was now sitting halfway up in bed with the cloth still sitting on his forehead. and able to take a sip from the water Bucky offered. Placing the glass back where he got if from, Bucky could now focus more on Steve. He’d cuddled closer to Bucky under all the layers.

Slowly, Bucky offered small spoons of the broth to his best friend. He was quite content about staying silent during this, but Steve was determined that Bucky keep his promise from earlier that day.

“Buck, this mornin’...”

“Yeah, I meant it. And not the “family” type. The actual type.” It felt good to actually tell Steve that. Bucky felt an invisible weight being lifted off his shoulders. Steve looked up at him with wide eyes and pulled Bucky down by his arm. Their lips met and opened up a world of possibilities. “And don’t worry Stevie, I’m not going anywhere.” 

 

* * *

I used the concept art from First Avenger as inspiration for their apartment, which can be found [here](http://shieldedstar.tumblr.com/post/106507071533/maxiekat-captain-america-concept-art-stark) 

You can find me on tumblr [here](http://shieldedstar.tumblr.com/)


End file.
